Love, Life & Home

10 Things We Learned About Each Other While Designing Our First Home Together

When we were younger, “together” meant racing each other to the swings, building sandcastles with too many moats, or comparing whose school bag was cooler. Then came the era of shiny things our fantasy world of “stuff” where materialism reigned. And then, without warning, life handed us something better: each other.

Suddenly, the everyday became magical. Grocery shopping together turned into a weekly date. Laundry became our quiet “I love you.” Cooking together wasn’t just a necessity it was our thing. And decorating our first living room together? Well… that felt as big as hosting a wedding.

But here’s the thing love is beautiful, yes, but it’s also human. And humans are different. Learning to co-exist under one roof is a whole new curriculum. Designing a space together? That’s the group project of a lifetime. Here’s what we discovered about each other (and ourselves) while turning an empty room into a home.

You’ll discover quirks you didn’t know existed and learn how to work as a team when opinions clash. Here’s what we found out (and how we got through it without throwing a throw pillow at each other).

1. We See “Comfort” Differently

One of us wanted a giant, nap-worthy sofa. The other dreamed of something sleek for entertaining. We ended up with a sofa that did both , cushy enough for movie nights, stylish enough for guests.

Couple Tip: When opinions differ, pause before saying “your way is wrong.” Take a breath, share why comfort matters to you, and look for a middle ground.

This may contain: a man in a suit is sitting on a couch and looking at a computer screen that says, how can i relax when i know this couch would look so much better in the opposite corner?

2. We Have Different Color Personalities

Jewel tones vs.airy neutrals the great paint swatch standoff. Our solution? A soft, neutral base with bold accents in art and pillows.

Couple Tip: If you hit a color wall ( nerve) , remember it’s not you vs. them, it’s both of you vs. the room. See where your tastes can meet halfway.

This may contain: a man sitting next to a woman on top of a couch

3. Our Sense of “Clutter” Is… Relative

One person’s cozy shelf is another’s visual chaos. We had to agree on which items had to be displayed and which could live in storage.

Couple Tip: Don’t let clutter debates turn personal. If you feel frustrated, take five minutes apart and come back with a calmer tone.

This may contain: two people talking to each other in the same room

4. We Organize Very Differently

One of us measured and mapped the room before moving a single item. The other hung art “by vibe.” In the end, the planner gave structure, the free spirit gave soul.

Couple Tip: Celebrate each other’s strengths. When you respect what the other brings to the table, there’s less reason to fight over who’s “right.”

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5. Our Spending Habits Showed Up

One was a “buy once, buy forever” type. The other? “Why not hunt for a bargain?” We compromised investing in pieces we’d keep for years and saving on accessories we could switch out.

Couple Tip: Money talks can get heated. Avoid starting these conversations when one of you is already stressed or tired.

This may contain: two people standing in front of a door with flowers on the floor and one person taking a selfie

6. We Bonded Over DIY

We built a coffee table together. There were moments of frustration (“Where’s the screwdriver?!”) but also the joy of finishing something together.

Couple Tip: If tempers flare mid-project, make each other laugh. Humor is a reset button for tense moments.

This may contain: a man and woman sitting in foamy bathtub next to each other with headphones on

7. We Have Different Ideas of “Relaxing”

One person’s dream corner was a reading nook; the other needed a giant TV setup. We zoned the room so both could have their “happy place.”

Couple Tip: Respect that relaxing looks different for each of you. It’s not a competition for whose way is better it’s about coexistence.

This may contain: the young man and woman are brushing their teeth

8. We Learned Each Other’s “Non-Negotiables”

Some things were untouchable like the heirloom armchair or the giant area rug. Respecting those sacred items built trust.

Couple Tip: When your partner shares a non-negotiable, don’t question it immediately. Ask them to tell you the story behind it you’ll understand more.

This may contain: a man and woman laughing while holding a cake in front of each other with the caption, it is nice when someone remembers the shailes details about you

9. We Realized How We Handle Stress

Late-night curtain hanging taught us everything about each other’s patience levels. We survived, laughed, and got curtains that (mostly) hung straight.

Couple Tip: In stressful moments, agree not to say anything you wouldn’t want remembered the next day. Anger fades , words stick.

This may contain: two people talking to each other with the caption that says, i love you thanks

10. We Built a Story Together

Every corner of our living room now has a memory attached and when guests compliment it, we get to tell our story.

Couple Tip: Take photos of the process. Looking back will remind you it wasn’t just about the furniture it was about building a life.

This may contain: a man sitting next to a woman on top of a couch

Designing your first living room together is part decor, part relationship boot camp. It’s about compromise, patience, laughter, and learning. And the reward? A space that feels like yours.

Want to discover your design style (and maybe your partner’s too)? Take the Design Style Quiz to see where your tastes match and where they clash before the paintbrushes come out.

We’re your patient ally through storms, winds, and rain, here to help you choose your favorite wall color, the comfiest sofa, and turn the space you dreamed of into the reality you now live in. Start your home dreams with Spacejoy.

 

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